Tuesday, June 23, 2009

Something old, something new...

Creative evolution is always inspiring. It's a wonderful feeling when suddenly a door in your mind opens and everything is flooded with a new light, a new way to see. I've been moving in this direction for the past month or more now, as you've all been witness too (and have been so very supportive in).

But it's coming to the time now where I find myself at a crossroads. I don't know if what I used to make a few months ago is something I'm ever going to go back to, and the idea of letting go of it for good frightens the toast outta me. This New Age space thing I've soaked myself in shows no signs of abating- in fact it's settled in quite nicely and now has it's feet on the couch eating all my food- to speak metaphorically. Dickens is sitting at the back door, staring balefully at me with sad eyes and wondering what's it done to be pushed out into the cold like that.


Writing in my bedside journal the other night I was trying to analyse what my shop is, in the attempt to better market myself. I started listing all the usual stuff; 'Derelict Victorian, cogless steampunk, faginpunk...and then I realised these words don't really fit my shop any more. I'm not steampunk without gears anymore. I'm ancient astronauts and Future tribalists; New Age post-apocalyptic androids. Granted there's still an essence of the worn-out and the ragged, but the make do and mend of the working classes of history has become a sort of survivalist foraging of found objects, like Mad Max or Escape from LA.


There comes a time in every change where we must acknowledge and let go of the past. In order to move forward we must release the old...and that's scary. No less scary in terms of art; what I have made and sold here online in the past year has been wonderful, interesting, joyous and (to be pragmatic) popular. I've always felt it come from the heart and I've always loved and believed in it. But there are chinks in the armour.


Is my derelict Dickens something I will ever come back to? Is this space age business here for good, or will it pass just as Dickens seems to have? Even just writing that my Dickens theme seems to have passed fills me with sadness. I still love it so much, I still have ideas rolling around in my head but most of them I can't get to without some basic metalwork skills. (Semiprecious Salvage and Complete metalsmith are in the post, thank you for all your suggestions!)


Most of this is mostly just panic. The fear that comes with sweeping out the old to make way for the new. I know that some things - the important things- will stay. You don't throw the baby out with the bathwater and there are times of positive light where I feel that by going on this space trip I've actually stripped my art down to the core of what I want to do, and that I'll be able to go back to the Dickens thing with more conviction.

But there are shadow times like this, where I worry that everything is lost. I have to let go of some things and have faith that something better will come along to fill the void. It's like dumping an old boyfriend- you still love them but some thing's between you isn't working any more. And you get a feeling that...you can do better.

13 comments:

Robyn said...

The discomfort before change can be daunting but once your new ideas start gaining momentum it's so exciting.

Sandy and Joe said...

Am intrigued by the piece with the button and lace. Love the textures. Thanks for sharing. Sandy/rhubarb reign

The Sobbing Settee ... said...

Sometimes you just have to let go of the old in order to set forth yourself and your art. You can always look back on a very succesful and beautiful past period. We all go through various stages in our lives and I believe your art develops with you in those stages and that is a good thing and yes ... scary at times. So ... don't panic, keep breathing and PLEASE keep creating your wonderful art.

Hugs, Miranda

Sophie Isobel Designs said...

I just adore that you are able to articulate in such beautiful detail, your inspiration, your path and your focus. You are such an inspiration and I am constantly in awe of your amazing creations. 'create your heart out'.
Sophie x
ps. I love the New Age post-apocalyptic androids!

Hexotica said...

Thanks for sharing such a poignant personal creative transformation. There must always be birth pangs for the new to be born. I have followed a few jewelry designers over the years and I love seeing them metamorphose. Have you ever come across RavenEve on Etsy? She has morphed from gothic to ethereal fairy
over the last few years and creates beautiful work now. I find your work is latent with stories and is very inspiring.

RowanDeVoe said...

ooh, i love all these new pieces and ideas! my art changes and evolves all the time but if changing something means making me sad then i think i wouldn't totally cut it out-maybe just make room for the new. and, i do remember watching star trek-the next generation and they had all kinds of time travelers on board like mark twain so maybe dickens will travel by transporter beam(is that the right term?) instead of using any gears? i think it could all work! don't be sad or anxious!
xo,
merle

Becca said...

I think it's a beautiful thing when your craft takes a new direction, evolves into something completely you. Shares a piece of your soul. I love it!

grecian goldsmith said...

Penny,

your new creations are a marvel, but you know what? I don't think you've left Dickens behind at all! In fact, you've just built him a time machine! Imagine Dickens two thousand years from now? Well, I don't have to imagine because I have your new shop to look at.

I bet that many, many years from now, there will be another depression and people will have to make do and mend their metal scraps and crystal pieces.

Keep going. You are an inspiration.

Sandra

Sayraphim said...

Hello lovely! Firstly, I'd like to say that sometimes it does feel like you're standing on a cliff, facing out into the darkness. New things can be so terrifying. But gather up the courage and leap. If it goes wrong, try something else. If it goes right, run with it. The worst thing I found was not the decision to leap, it was the agonising moments beforehand.

Much luck for you. And I've dropped by to tell you that you have been given the One Lovely Blog Award. You can visit http://page63.blogspot.com/2009/06/one-lovely-blog-award.html to see who else received one.

Congratulations and cake!

Sayraphim

Heather said...

I would say just follow your heart-- just because you do one style doesnt mean you cant dabble in another. I have certain 'themes' i like in art and usually go from one to the other---getting tired of one and changing it to another...only to come back months later. Dont make your scope so narrow you're not confortable. Even though you've changed inspirations, I still see a lot of common threads-- like color scheme and deconstruction-- in both styles. Embrace it!~

Tinniegirl said...

Leap and the net will appear, as Julia Cameron says in The Artist Way.

I loved reading this post. It sums up exactly how I have been feeling about my Tinnies. It's time to move on but it's really hard to let go. Gosh, it's how I feel about a whole lot of things actually.

Jen Crossley said...

How I love looking at your blog your eye candy makes me groan and I get all inspired
Jen

Libby Buttons said...

I think this is beautiful !
The lace makes it unique.

Smiles